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♥ Love or Hate [Review]
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Author: GUILUNLOVER Story: LOVE OR HATE URL: http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/theguilunlover2/ Reviewer: Juliada3 Title: 4-/5 Your title is pretty good. It makes people a little curious as to what your story is about. It fits the story, and doesn't give the story away. Poster/Background: -9/10 Your poster and background look really good. Your poster has all of the characters, so that's good, and your background is simple and it doesn't make the text hard to read. Good job! Forewords: -8/10 Your forewords were really good. You had a synopsis that described some of what the story is about, and you listed the characters and gave a pretty good description of each one. Plot: -13/15 Your plot is pretty different. I haven't read a story before where there was a magic school after school. Its interesting, and you added some twists that made the reader want to read the next chapter. Creativity/Originality: -13/15 I thought that the magic school was pretty creative and original. You could have added some more stuff in there to make it more original though. If you created something completely different and added that in there, your story would be even better and more exciting. Flow: -8/10 The flow was pretty good. You didn't rush that much, and you didn't drag out some scenes. That's good, because you keep the reader's interest better when you keep it at a steady pace. Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary: -6/10 You had a couple of grammar mistakes and spelling mistakes. You could fix those by using Microsoft Word to spell check it, or you could have someone else do it for you. I would be willing to help you with that. You could also add more vocabulary in there. You have some, but better vocabulary will help your imagery. You also had a few punctuation problems. Characterisation: -6/10 You could improve your characterization. I didn't get much of a feel for the character of some of the cast. If you added more descriptions about their facial expressions, or their emotions, then the reader would be able to understand the character better. Writing Style: -6/10 Your writing style is pretty good. You could put spaces in between every couple of lines or every line so it doesn't look so squished together. If you space it out, it will be easier for the reader to read it and not get lost. Overall Enjoyment: -4/5 I liked this story. I hope you update soon! Sub Total: -77/100 Bonus: -2/5 Total: -79/100 (0 happiness)
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