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♥ The End [Review]
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
Author: UnknownViet Story Title: The End Story URL: http://www.winglin.net/fanfic/end Reviewer: SaMaNtHa Title: -5/5 It fits the story line really well. It also gave us a feel of what we were going to read or gave us an idea of the story. It didn't really capture my eyes but it matched your story! So all in all it was okay. Poster/Background: -8/10 Personally I liked the poster a lot it's really pretty, the font was also easy to read! But the background was really plain, there wasn't much on it, it was really plain but the poster was really pretty. Forewords: -7/10 The forewords was really great! You added a really interesting plot. You started off the story really strong, it really captured your readers attention. So that was really good. But about the characters you didn't add much about them, yes you added the names but that's it. So I gave you some points for this section, if you added more information about the characters you would've gotten a better score. Plot: -9/15 The plot was okay. It was really plain and simple. You could and should of gotten deeper into the details about their relationship before the breakup and also give us, the readers a feel of their fights and why it was too much for her, so in the end she had to break up with him. If you added these details then you would've gotten a better score. Creativity/Originality: -10/15 I read more than enough of these story lines. I kind of knew what was going to happen but you also wrote it really well. You added some things that were really unique and interesting like the flower scene. The creativity wasn't really there for me. It was a really simple plot to write so this was okay. Flow: -10/10 I thought the flow was good. It wasn't too slow nor too fast it was good. As the writer you gave the readers a timeline from how you wrote. So the readers knew that the time in the story was taken in a day. Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary: -5/10 You had mistakes here and there like the word Just you wrote "jsut", and embarrassed you wrote "embarassed" So they were just little mistakes here and there but its important to fix those little mistakes because it throws off the reader. Characterization: -7/10 The characterization was okay not great. You should of added more details and described their personalities more; to give out the characters image to the readers. Writing Style: -9/10 Your writing style was good! It was understandable and easy to fallow. But like I said before, if you added more details it would of been better. Overall Enjoyment: -5/5 I enjoyed it, was a good story. Sub Total: -75/100 Bonus: -5/5 I hope this review will help you to write better! And I also hope that this review won't discourage you but encourage you to write more! Total: -80/100 (0 happiness)
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